SAG Awards – Red Carpet Rundown

I’m a bit late for this recap because I had to take time yesterday to recover from the Brad and Jenn thing. If you don’t know what thing I mean than you wouldn’t care if I explained it but just let the rest of us live in our early 2000’s fantasy world where Friends is still on and these two are still sharing the same hair colorist. Fun fact: They are currently using the same stylist team of Nina and Claire…things that make you go hmmmmm. Basically this photo right here is everything.

 

 

So oh yeah they were other people there besides Brad and Jenn. This is probably my favorite of the awards shows to actually watch the awards part because this is actors voting on their peers, as opposed to other awards that are by some exclusive confusing committee. This is basically your co-workers at work validating your hard work. And it’s film and television so you get lots of people to look at.

I’m going to keep the feel good feelings going by starting with the looks I loved.

I’m a sucker for a classic and chic Hollywood look, and all these dresses look like they could have been from the past 50 years or so on Audrey Hepburn or Sophia Loren. Zoe’s gloves come up just high enough to keep the look modern and JLo totally redeemed herself from that Christmas gift wrap disaster of a dress. Biggest surprise was Jenn wearing white! This girl is a die hard for her black dresses. But back in the day she did wear white and with her California tan and golden locks it looks amazing on her. Hmmmm…white when she was Brad then and suddenly wearing white again now….okay I’ll try and stop.

Speaking of classic Jenn’s dress is actually a vintage gown by John Galliano for Dior from the Spring/Summer 1999 collection. Jenn loved the dress so much that she purchased it to keep from LILY Et Cie, the high end luxury vintage boutique in Beverly Hills. The only very obvious issue with this perfectly cut on the bias satin perfection of a gown is the nipplegate issue that occurred. It’s very tricky to wear any kind of undergarments under this kind of satin material because it literally hugs every curve and shows everything so perhaps this is why she went sans bra. Everywhere Jenn went so did her very noticeable nipples. I am sure there was no way she didn’t know this so perhaps she is just very happy with her well placed and shaped nipples? I dunno.

 

I’m always a fan of the dressed up pants and both of these young actresses perfected the look by nailing the accessories, the makeup and the hair. And I think the look has enough edge to be totally age appropriate and current.

And then there’s this look on Logan Browning that was just breathtakingly beautiful. She is literally floating in the dress and the color is just gorgeous.

Image: 26th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards - Arrivals

 

I love this dress on Sophie Turner but the chrome on the belt is annoying me. I get that it’s Louis Vuitton and it’s kind of signature thing right now but I just wish it was all pink and no chrome. But this is a shade we don’t normally see on the red carpet its refreshing. Her hair and makeup are flawless.

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I loved this dress on Renee. I loved the Bardot inspired updo. I just wish for different color lip..maybe red? And maybe a stunning earring, like an emerald drop, for that extra finishing touch.

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Volume was a trend of sorts and I gotta say I don’t like it. I guarantee these woman cannot use the ladies room without significant amounts of help. If you have ever worn a wedding dress you know that stalls are not built for these kind of dresses and you also know that your maid of honor better really love you because she’s the one sent in to help you lift up the skirt and hope for the best aim. It’s not a glamourous job. I don’t even find these dresses to be pretty on their own and I don’t believe on the dress getting noticed before the woman herself.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by David Fisher/Shutterstock (10525963ad) Kathryn Newton 26th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Shrine Auditorium, Los Angeles, USA – 19 Jan 2020

Another trend that was huge last night was bad hair and bad makeup. I’m sorry but there was a lot of it. Fashion does not exist in a vacuum and it take a team of fashion stylists, hair stylists and makeup artists to all do their part to make the look come together. This group project mentality was simply not there for these looks.

The first catastrophe was the severe part down the middle and pulled back look. Charlize’s hair stylist even went so far as to place a Tiffany bracelet on her hair part in effort to …Hell I don’t know what the point was there. It was weird.

Charlize’s makeup is beautiful as there is a color thing going on with her eye makeup that warms up the looks. The other two have 50 shades of Nude going on which closely resembles a corpse.

There is an exception to this wet hair slicked back look. When it is done with volume at the crown it can work. This softens it slightly so we don’t feel like we are looking at a dancer from the Robert Palmer Addicted to Love video. And the slightest pink lip is soft compliment to the smoky eye. Also love that the dress is lingerie inspired by cut without being trashy.

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This hair isn’t greasy. It’s fluffy and messy. Why? It’s perfectly fine for every other occasion but this looks says I air-dried my hair and my hair stylist never showed up.

 

Speaking of bad hair on a gorgeous woman…what was happening with Margot Robbie’s look? The dress is too much with the jewelry and the plaid and the ruffles,  and the grown in  dark roots cannot be a thing. Her skin and makeup though are per usual amazing and really she is such a gorgeous human that she looks best when she goes more simple. 

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Back to makeup, there was some harsh goth stuff going on that felt very severe. Imagine these dresses with a softer look that is less vampy. Maybe do a major eye or a major lip but doing both here doesn’t seem to work. Or maybe a nude lip? Although the dress on the left is another case of volume overload. 

This dress got mixed reactions when I discussed it with friends. Some of them liked it but I can’t get past the Jessica McClintock 1980’s thing going on with that pearl fringe. I want to like it because normally I love what Allison Janney wears but I just can’t with this one.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Rob Latour/Variety/Shutterstock (10525967be) Allison Janney 26th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Shrine Auditorium, Los Angeles, USA – 19 Jan 2020

This one may have been inspired by Alfred Hitchcock’s The Birds movie. Imagine it without those black things all over it and it would be a lovely dress.

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Stylists are always telling their clients that the perfect look is achieved with good tailoring. What happened here? Why would he want to do this?

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA – JANUARY 19: Casey Thomas Brown attends the 26th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards at The Shrine Auditorium on January 19, 2020 in Los Angeles, California. 721430 (Photo by Gregg DeGuire/Getty Images for Turner)

And sadly this lovely girl has the dreaded underarm overflow that we are all afraid of. This unfortunate shot has the dress doing the most unflattering things under her arm. And these are tiny women who have great figures but this awkward fit is distracting. 

Mandatory Credit: Photo by David Fisher/Shutterstock (10525963aq) Elizabeth McLaughlin 26th Annual Screen Actors Guild Awards, Arrivals, Shrine Auditorium, Los Angeles, USA – 19 Jan 2020
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I love these women but didn’t love their look.

Jenn is so pretty and this shade of red is gorgeous but it just feels a bit like prom to me. Maybe if it went straight down? 
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Reese has been trying these edgy bob thing and I just don’t think it works on her. Imagine her is this dress with soft retro Veronica Lake type curls. So much better. 


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I almost want these two to switch dresses as I feel like it is time for Jenn to go a bit edgier and maybe Reese can keep the edgier hair if she goes with the more classic Southern belle type of dress. 

So you did you lover? Who did you not care for? And who are looking most forward to seeing on the next red carpet?? And how do you feel about Brad and Jenn??

Thanks for reading! 
Suzie 

Golden Globes Rundown -hits, misses and just straight up confused.

I love watching the red carpet during awards show season. There is so much going on behind every fashion choice because of one word. Money. Remember, these awards are flattering to the nominees and an honor for the winner, but make no mistake this is all about marketing. Image of an actor is often very blurred between onscreen and off, so hitting the right note in public perception is very important to all those head honchos who are in production at the big movie studios as well as the the more recent power players on the scene, like Apple and Netflix.

So keep in mind as much as an actor is a living, breathing, human being, they are also a vehicle of representation for whatever show or movie they are a part of at that time. Only a few can really truly say “Whatever, I’m wearing what I want”, and that club is reserved for veterans like Meryl Streep (she will continue to get roles even if she dresses like a dolphin on the red carpet), Reese Witherspoon (she changed the game by buying the rights to scripts and producing them herself), and Gwyneth Patlrow (self proclaimed semi-retired but grandfathered in as Hollywood royalty, plus married to a very prolific triple threat writer, director and producer).

Keeping all of this in mind let’s take a look at what the newbies and the “I don’t cares” wore for one of the most photographed carpets of the year.

Let’s start with the ones that I always look forward to but this year their stylists went on vacation or they were allowed to choose what they wanted to wear all by themselves. Either way these bombed for me big time.

J.Lo, Jenny from the Block, Jennifer Gift Wrapped Lopez

BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA – JANUARY 05: Jennifer Lopez attends the 77th Annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 05, 2020 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)

Elf is one of my favorite Christmas movies. I am also a huge fan of Tim Gunn, especially when he hosted Project Runway, where aspiring fashion designers were given odd materials or assignments and a short deadline to come up with a specific look. In my mind Tim Gunn visited Will Farrell’s Elf character at the gift wrapping department and told him to “Make it Work!” The result was a conglomerate of white tissue paper and lots of ribbon tied into a big bow.

Jennifer Lopez is one of the sexiest women on the planet, she can wear pretty much anything. So why this? The piles of braids resembled some kind of trifle dish and the matching green jewelry felt very “He went to Jared.” Maybe A-Rod told her he loved it just so he didn’t have to deal with other men drooling over her all night? Maybe he just thinks of her as his “gift”? Maybe she was temporarily blind??

Charlize Theron, Molly Sims and Sienna Miller…aka BiPolar Style

I’m so confused. The color is terrible. And the deconstructed look just feels so forced. Maybe in black it could have worked better? But that necklace…it just can’t be saved. So disappointed as she usually nails it.

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The top looks like a bikini. The bottom is ill-fitting and the color looks like that pre-cut celery kept in water that I typically buy but forget about and then find in the back of my fridge. I just don’t get it.

Molly’s dress is beautiful…until you get to the bottom. Imagine this sleek all the way down without that tulle explosion on the bottom. It would have been so much better if kept simple.

Sexy Bondage? Kerry Washington and Cate Blanchett

Ummmm…..This just looks really super uncomfortable. And would require a hell of a lot of fashion sticky tape. They sell things like these on Amazon. They are called Bikini Body Chain Bling. Don’t believe me? Look it up. These are a tie with JLo for the worst looks for me.

Let’s Switch It Up…

Sometimes it’s not that the dress is that bad but rather just doesn’t seem to “fit” the person wearing it. Here’s some women that I’d like to see trade dresses with each other.

I want to see Michelle in the sequins with that retro Hollywood bob and bff Busy in the peachy confection (minus the blue misplaced accent). Busy’s beachy waves would be the perfect contract to the Grecian style gown.

While both of these dresses aren’t bad on each famous blonde I think they could be so much better if they switched. Michelle’s casual loose waves would be striking against the simple tailored lines of the blue column gown. While Renee’s classic upswept hair would look chic agains this black multi-textured dress that would soften her toned arms just a bit.

I just think that Naomi has the red carpet experience to better pull off this fancied floral while I like Taylor is something more sleek and sexy like this black Armani halter neck.

Jen loves black, this we know. And it works for her. But when she does her hair in this loose waves versus her other signature straight and sleek then I want to see her in a dress that is straight and sleek. I just think it compliments her better. And I think this flounced neckline and belted ballgown would have been just stunning on Christina with a nod to a bit of drama.

Perfect Example Of “I’ll Wear Whatever I Want”…Goopy Gwyneth

I’m not even going to show the rest of this dress because this is enough awful right here for you to get the idea. Gwyneth is an “it girl”, whether we like her or not. I actually like her in interviews as she comes across pretty self aware (goop and all) but still my instinct for some reason is not to like her. Weird, I know. But mark my words, “it” girls like her make and break trends and this whole necklace under the mesh look will be a thing. This was not an accident or subtle statement. This was her new thing and soon people will start consciously uncoupling from their theory that necklaces have to be on top of your clothing (how 2010s!)

The Looks That Made Me Put Down My Champagne. Helen, Zoe and Nicole. Thank you.

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She’s a damn Dame and she dresses like one. That neckline, that necklace, that color. To all those 20 somethings who say ” Bring it”, this says oh “It’s already been Brought-en”. Except Dame Helen Mirren would use proper English and grammar. And yes I just shamelessly quoted from Not Another Teen Movie because I love that movie.

Mandatory Credit: Photo by Shutterstock (10517029ky) Zoe Kravitz 77th Annual Golden Globe Awards, Arrivals, Los Angeles, USA – 05 Jan 2020

Very few people can pull off this dress. It may be simple classic polka-dots but if you put this on cutesy actress with a cutesy haircut it looks like an extra from Alice in Wonderland. The cuteness of this dress turns to sexy chic only because it is worn by the fierce perfection of Zoe Kravitz. That hair, that makeup, that stare that basically says “Don’t f@#k with me” in perfect irony to the feminine cute polka dots. She is a gorgeous badass.

BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA – JANUARY 05: Nicole Kidman attends the 77th Annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 05, 2020 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Jon Kopaloff/Getty Images)

Oh Nicole your face may be a bit frozen but you style is on fire. The fit, the tailoring, the cut…this is a gown. That material looks more expensive than my car, and I mean that in a good way. It’s hard for red not to read cheap, the weight of the fabric, the tone, the exact shade, everything has to be just right. This is perfection. And the the simple, sleek hair looks elegant without that overly slick style we saw so much of on this carpet. Her earrings are a nod to one of my other favorite movies, Moulin Rouge. And yes, one can love Not Another Teen Movie just as much as Moulin Rouge. This look is elegant and I love it.

Honorable Mention. Zoey Dutch? Who Dat?

BEVERLY HILLS, CALIFORNIA – JANUARY 05: Zoey Deutch attends the 77th Annual Golden Globe Awards at The Beverly Hilton Hotel on January 05, 2020 in Beverly Hills, California. (Photo by Steve Granitz/WireImage)

So I’m kind of old and not up on all of the shows or the new actresses out there. I felt that much older when I googled Zoey Dutch and found out she is Leah Thompson’s daughter. Yes, Leah Thompson from Back to the Future and Howard the Duck. So she is 25 years old and a steady actress, most recently known for The Politician. I don’t know much about her or her role but I know that this color and this dress was a bit of risk and I think it totally worked. The oversized sleeves are on trend without feeling like a costume. She shows just enough skin where it doesn’t seem like she is trying too hard, in fact it almost feels modest with all of that fabric. The jewelry? That necklace was what put this dress into a whole different category for me. It’s an interesting choice, blue against this bold yellow, and it’s at a unique length. It elevated this dress and pulled the whole look together. And this is the only actress that night that I feel successfully pulled off this slicked back early 90s supermodel look correctly. Total Linda Evangelista Vibes. Reese Witherspoon tried this slicked back hair look and I don’t think it worked for her. With Zoey I am definitely looking forward to what we could see next from her in terms of style.

And The Golden Globe(s) goes to…

Salma Hayek, who brought her own set of golden globes complete with stripper platforms. Why, oh Why? Salma can’t possible champion the #metoo movement while carrying an almost illegal amount of cleavage. I’m not a guy and I wouldn’t even be able to look her in the face because I would be so distracted by the display. She’s too good for this trashy look and I would hope for better form this Hollywood veteran.

Okay, if you are still with me, that is all for my ranting and raving. I’d love to hear your feedback. I took about 10 pages of notes on so many looks that I didn’t even mention but I’m also trying not to make anyone doze off while reading this. And remember, fashion is art, it is subjective, open to your opinion and, good or bad, the opinion of everyone else. This blog post is meant in fun and in no way to be cruel to any of these women who bravely have to put themselves out here for the fashion wolves just because acting is their job. I admire all of them and could never in a million years walk that carpet. That said, I want to see them look their best and sometimes I just think maybe their stylist secretly hates them??

Anyway thank you for reading!

xo

Suzie

The Gift List

Over the years of working in closets and with clothes there are a few items that I have tried and trusted and go to time and time again. Some are weird…sulfur on your face (trust me) and some our way expensive (cashmere travel wrap). But these are the things I recommend to all my clients and I promise you they will get used whether you gift them or you get them for yourself. All items are linked through a curated catalogue I created and can be accessed through this link.

This simple cotton tank from Target is a true layering essential. I have a small drawer that has about 5 white, 3 black and probably one of every other color. This is your grown-up bra friendly undershirt that I tuck into my pants and take on every trip.


This is my favorite brand of t-shirts that don’t cling, they aren’t see through and they have hemlines that don’t cut you off going straight across. Lots of styles and colors but the white is my favorite and go-to because of the texture and fit.


A weird but amazing stocking stuffer. I swear to you this works. It smells terrible for the 10 minutes you have it on but it is the only thing that has ever worked on those awful below the surface volcano like painful pimples that you can feel forming deep below the surface of your skin. It’s a life saver and won’t dry out your skin – a true miracle.


Life changer – perfect for travel and to freshen up your clothes. Easy to use and much easier than an iron. Great for delicate fabrics!

These are THE Spanx leggings and yes they really are great. I love these with the shine because you can dress them down with sneakers and hoodie. Grab them locally at No. 109 and size up and don’t feel bad because that’s just the way they are cut.


There are others but this one is the classic. I bought my cream one 20 years ago and it has traveled with me everywhere. My sister even had it on her during her labor in the hospital room – that’s a looooong story about I got “stuck” in the room!


Locally I buy this jacket at No.109. It’s deceiving because it looks cute but this thing has the kind of hood that comes up and over and stays up. It has kept me bone dry even through that torrential rain we had this year during Mother’s Day at the Willowdale Steeplechase. And it layers beautifully over everything from a dress to a sweater. Another travel must have.


Lisa from Chantilly Blue first told me about this amazing shirt, called The Shirt, that fits over any and all chest sizes and still fits tailored through the waist. It is a wardrobe essential. Invented by a woman, designed by a woman, for women’s bodies. Available at Chantilly Blue and online.

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This is the collarless “going out” blazer from J.Crew. If you own this and a white tank or t shirt you just need a pair of jeans and you will always have a chic go to outfit.


Cuddleduds – this is long underwear for grownups. I wear these under all of my sweaters all winter and they keep me so warm but they are never bulky and everything fits over them perfectly without bunching.


These are my favorite jammies ever and I am super picky because I love sleeping so damn much. They are super soft, also come in set as shorts and come in prints. The best part? They are from Target and super affordable.


I love dogs. And dogs are hairy. And I love hugging my dogs, my clients’ dogs, strangers’ dogs. And of course I wear a lot of black. And how annoying is it when you can’t find the end of the roll to peel off of a lint roller or it’s trapped in a drawer stuck to something else. This beautiful little tool keeps each roll fresh and sticky for quick touchups. I have one in the car, in my closet and in my handbag.


I was first gifted one of these by my friend Ashley who sells this line at her Ashley Austin boutique in Kennett Square. Sara Happ herself came to an in store event and her own lips are just as heavenly as this gloss. This is another thing I keep one of everywhere – the car, by my bed, my desk etc.


Another favorite I learned about locally when Heather at No. 109 started to carry them. These are the only hats that do not itch my head because they are 100% cotton. The pom detaches so you can throw it into the washer if like me you get your makeup on it! And the best part is that 50% of the purchase price goes to pediatric cancer support and research.


My dear friend Jen created these bracelets several years ago after an accident left her with time on her hands during recovering. What started out as a small hobby is now sold everywhere from QVC to the Park Plaza hotel in NYC. So many designs, colors and charms and you can buy them locally at the first ever store to carry them – Chantilly Blue in Kennett Square.


It’s faux, it’s warm, it’s cozy and it’s easy to wear because of the built in slide-through. Keep it on all day and wear it like a necklace or layer it over your coat. They come in a ton of colors so grab a neutral and fun bright color.


My friend Kate gave me these and I feel bad ass when I wear them because they are called the Boss Babe earring from Uncommon James. They edge up everything from a t-shirt to a cocktail dress.


This is my favorite party trick. I have varicose veins and spots and practically translucent legs that look like they have purple and blue road maps on them in the winter. Simply spray this leg makeup/foundation into your hands and apply and it will only come off with soap and water in the shower. I’ve worn it in the summer at an outdoor wedding where it was 99 degrees and full humidity and it doesn’t budge. It gives the perfect “airbrushed” finish without the complication of a fake tanner mishap. Find it in the nail care section in stores like Target, CVS and Walmart.


This is the unique slipper in that in can be worn indoors or out and they are the warmest thing ever on my feet. Comes in many colors and styles but this black is my go to.


I hate putting water on my face for some reason. Especially before bed. When I’m tired I’m done and I’m really lazy. This takes it all off and leaves nothing behind. Works on all eye makeup too. And my face feels just right after, not greasy and not dry.

I can’t scream enough about this bag. It folds flat when you don’t need it. It has just the right size compartments and an inner and detachable storage bag. It fits my laptop. I can use it as an overnight bag. It’s been through hell and back and I can wipe it down with a Clorax wipe and it is always good to go. Simply the best.

I don’t know what is in this and I don’t care. I’ve tried everything else. This is the best if like me you are sweating even when it is freezing out. The smell is the most subtle ever but it is so good that even one my friends’ husbands starting using it!

That’s it! It’s not as good as Oprah’s but I stand behind all of these. Happy Shopping and thanks for reading!

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Weight A Minute…

Nope that’s not a spelling error. It’s a reference to my weight and how annoyed I am with it. You know how most people think they look worse than they actually do? In this particular case I had got dressed in my favorite black jumpsuit for a family wedding. I looked in the mirror before I left and felt confident. It’s not that I thought I looked amazing but If felt good enough in it that I didn’t think about my outfit the rest of the night. Due to some work and schedule commitments that our husband’s had, my sister and I ended up going as each other’s dates to a family wedding. This was so much fun because truthfully we are rarely ever out where it is just the two of us, no husbands, no kids, no obligations. We laughed so hard the whole care ride down to Alexandria and we made the most of the time we had before the wedding by hitting up all kinds of different bars, restaurants and shops. In fact, we left ourselves very little time to actually get ready, hence the pony tail in the picture, it was also about 1,000 degrees so wearing my hair down was not happening. The picture below was taken of me and my cousin Connor. I was the first grandchild born into my mother’s side of the family and our cousin Connor was the last. Last year after he graduated high school he enlisted with the United States Marines. Our whole family could not be more proud of him and it was a special occasion that he was able to attend the wedding. I’m smiling a huge natural smile in this photo because I was having a great night.

But you know what’s awful? When this picture popped up on Facebook I wanted to cry. Actually kind of laugh too because the crotch area of the jumpsuit immediately reminded me of the It’s Pat body type from Saturday Night Live. It had felt a little tight but I had worn it just 2 months prior and it fit fine. My mind immediately went to how to untag myself from the photo or at least make sure it didn’t show up on my timeline. Meanwhile it’s a great photo of my handsome cousin. This is a guy who completed The Crucible part of his boot camp with a pneumonia and a broken nose who has enlisted to fight for our country and I’m worried about what I look like in the photo.

But still I preceded to zoom in on the unflattering shot and send it to my friends and family. Yes, I’m serious. What kind of self-obsessed weirdo does this shit? Me, I do. I’m telling you this because I know many of you do too. My best friend looked at the photo and said “I’m sure it’s just a bad angle…”. Ouch, that’s the honest way of saying, yeah, not the best photo.

I even made my husband, who was laying next to me almost asleep in bed, put on his glasses and look at the picture.”Look I said! It’s hideous! I’m so fat! It’s the worst!” My husband looked at me like I was nuts and simply said “Stop it, you’re beautiful.” He truly is one of those men who tells me this every day, even when I wake up with my eyes smeared in mascara, wearing one of his t-shirts and his boxers (sad but true this is my favorite kind of pajamas). He sends me texts to tell me this, he looks me in the eyes and says this, and, I know by looking into his eyes that he believes this because he is not shallow and he is a good person. I mean clearly he married me for my cooking skills. (I’ll wait while we both recover from laughing so hard) And yet, I ungratefully whine and complain and take it all for granted simply because I don’t like what I see. There were other photos that I thought I liked from that night like the one from below. But I also know that they have been cropped, light adjusted and just short of photo-shopped. Even this one below has my arm doing that weird thing where it looks like a French crepe at my underarm. Everyone has some of this when they hold their arm this way, it’s called skin, but but I couldn’t crop it out without cropping out part of my head, trust me I tried!

You see I’ve made a business out of working with women of all ages and all sizes to help them not just with their wardrobes but on a deeper level with their self-esteem. Usually I can never even tell the flaws that they are worried about but I work with them to make sure I help them to feel confident of at least hiding these flaws. I can’t take them away if they feel them or if they see them. I can work to flatter the best parts of them and make it so that they stand a little taller and feel a little better. My ultimate goal is to have them not really think about what they look like after they put on their outfit at all. I want them to be able to get dressed quickly and feel confident, so that they can get out the door and onto the more important things in their life other than what they look like. And yet, here I was, a super hypocrite who was wallowing in self-pity for the extra weight I’ve gained. Truth is I have gained about 20 pounds over the last couple years. I’ve gained weight eating pizza, drinking wine, staying up and watching movies with my kids and eating snacks. I’ve gained weight simply because I am getting older and it’s our bodies and our hormones start to change. There is even that super twisted part of me who thinks that maybe I self-sabotage a bit by still eating pizza, carbs and pasta because then I almost feel in control of gaining weight in a very weird way, as opposed to the women I know who are working out and eating close to nothing and still their bodies are changing and growing out in the middle where our waists once were. People are polite and say “I can’t tell!” or “No, you look great!” But we’ve all been there where suddenly our bras don’t fit right, jeans feel like a straight jacket for our stomachs and even underwear is too tight.

But I don’t look back and regret any meal. Okay maybe some of the fast food ones but the point is it has all been me living my life. I’ve always wanted to be an example to my daughter that in an increasingly visual world where youth and a great body are doctored, photo shopped and delivered on a silver platter, that it was what’s on the inside and how we live our lives. I’ve worked with clients who are sick, their bodies riddled with cancer, who would do anything, and I mean anything to put on some kind of weight onto their frail bones. Their bodies are so sick from the cancer drugs that food is simply rejected. I’ve helped them try and find something to fit while they muster up the strength and the courage to go to their family weddings. And yet here I am bitching about this stupid shit. I’m also the one who takes 30 selfies, making sure to cut out any unflattering arm angles or forehead wrinkles before I post them onto my social media. As far as I know I don’t think I’ve ever had anyone hire me because of what I look like. Sure it’s important to look pulled together if I am trying to represent my business of image, but perfection has never been something I’ve preached nor have I wanted to practice. I’m not a fashionista. I love clothes and getting dressed up but in a weird way I’m more of a cheerleader for my clients. I’m the blacksmith putting together the suit of armor so that my clients can protect themselves from insecure thoughts that creep into all of our heads. I wish I had Lizzo’s confidence but when I’ve spend 30 minutes trying to get dressed, there’s 8 pairs of jeans that I’ve spent good money on that don’t fit on the floor, and I’m running late it’s freaking frustrating. It’s not always the number that is so upsetting or our physical shape but the fact that we are staring at a closet full of clothes that worked 2 days ago but failed us today. Do you go shopping and spend more money for a bigger size? Squeeze into what we have? Or skip the wine and bread and cheese for a week and hope the jeans fit again soon? If I have the opportunity to ever go to Italy you’re damn straight I’m gonna eat and drink my way through the country. But sure, like ever other woman I know I will then come back and beat myself up when I’m stuck with a closet full of clothes and nothing that doesn’t make me feel like a bloated tick. I get it. I do. It’s annoying that our bodies feel out of our control.

There are lots of jobs that unfortunately do require us to upkeep a certain kind of image. That’s a shit ton of pressure. I hear people question all the time why someone is wearing something or just commenting on someone’s weight. You never ever know what is going on with that person. I’ve had the physical and emotionally opportunity to be with women inside their closets. The woman that you may look at and think her pants are too tight may have just lost 120 pounds and is super excited to be wearing jeans with a button and zipper again. Another woman who is super skinny may be sick and can’t put on weight. Or that really fit person with the great body? Maybe they really love working out and that makes them happy. Can you imagine being on television? Or in a movie? Or even an athletic trainer, who I am sure feels the pressure to look a certain way. We have no right at any time to judge. Stay in your lane and live your best life.

I do want to lose a little weight because as we get older it becomes about our health more than vanity. Over the summer I met with my friend Charlene Richardson, owner of Anchor Life and Fitness. She asked if I wanted to be involved in helping the winner of their six week challenge program go shopping. Of course I was on board but I a couple of weeks ago I actually enlisted myself in the challenge. I would feel like a fraud helping someone who worked so hard go shopping when I was afraid myself to try and put myself into something that I am traditionally terrible at, i.e. any remotely athletic activity other than walking and even then I usually trip, fall, or stub my toe. I want to show my kids that I am going to put my health before beauty. And one of my very favorite things about Charlene is that she confessed to me that she actually feels conscious working out at any other gym but her own. I look at her and see a strong kick ass woman so how could this be? Because, just like the rest of us, she feels the pressure. If she goes to another gym and people know she is a trainer they may look at her and judge her on what she is lifting, on her form, on her body. As amazing as I know she is this made me like her this much more to know that she get’s that feeling. It’s why her gym looks more like and feels like you are at someone’s ultra cool home as opposed to an intimidating gym.

Wanting to change but doing it is all well and good to say but it’s not very easy to do. It takes time and happens in stages. I’m not about to post a picture of my fat rolls in a bikini. I’m not that confident with complete body acceptance and I’m not sure I’ll ever be. And that’s alright too. Wherever you are, whatever you believe, it’s okay. It’s about working to find the mindset that matches your inner compass, whatever that may be. And for me, that compass has pointed to different things throughout the years. Currently it is pointing in the direction of a dire need to find the good.

One of my favorite places to be is in my own backyard in the hour or so before and just after sunset. The sky is stunning and it’s never the same. Lately I have been so freaking pissed off because there is noisy, dirty construction of houses that will be going up right smack in the middle of this view. Last night I ate dinner outside with my daughter. It was the first time in a while because I had avoided sitting out back because I was too busy letting it piss me off so much. But then I looked at the sunset. It is still there. It’s still just as beautiful. It just depends what part of the picture I choose to look at.

My view, and my body, will never be the same as it once was. People change, the world changes and we have to adapt or be left screaming and standing still. It’s not easy and I’m not always going to feel this positive. But today, I am trying. When I look at that black and white photo I will still see the “It’s Pat” character stomach, I can’t make it just go away. But I’m going to focus on the memory of having the photo taken. Time spent with family, with my cousin who is serving our country, and a weekend of belly laughs with my sister. I want to be a better example for my daughter and I want to make sure that my client’s know that I get it. I really do. I have always asked them to be as open and honest with me about everything when it comes to getting them into the right outfit that makes them feel good. I can only get that kind of honesty by giving the same in return.

And, to complete the cycle of instagram versus reality, here are some shots I am happy to share and some I cannot believe I am sharing. Enjoy!

Thank you for reading, I know it was a long one. I’m looking forward to getting back to writing a bit and sharing some more open stories about getting dressed and keeping it real.

Suzie

Hung Up On Hangers?

Here’s your go-to guide

Almost after every  client visit I recommend investing in good hangers to take care of your clothes. Having matching hangers is visual serenity and makes your closet feel like your own personal boutique, however, there is not a one type fits all solution if you really want to take care of your clothes. Below is a bit of a primer and why I like to have a combination for my clothes.

Wooden Hangers

  • Pros – Sturdy and strong these are built to last with a classic and clean good look to them. Have a swivel S-hook (that metal thing on the the top that makes it easier to have all your clothing facing the same direction). The notches help with any slippery items. They make your closet feel like you are shopping in a boutique.
  • Cons –  Bulky, they will take up a lot of room in your closet.
  • Price – Not cheap, Pricey (think between $1.50 -$2 per hanger)
  • Where To Buy –  Home Depot,  Bed, Bath and Beyond, Amazon, and online wholesalers. I use these in my closet but I had to do it in phases due to the cost.

The Slim Line Hanger

Honey-Can-Do 20-Pack Velvet Touch Suit/Dress Hangers
  • Pros – Visually appealing, these are the modern look for today’s closet. The velvety finish assures your tops won’t fall off. Now available in pretty much every shade, although I think black is best because you can always add to it and know it will match. The slim feature means you can pack a lot into a space (this could be a good or bad thing…)
  • Cons – Not super strong or good for heavy items, they do break. Not all are made with a swivel S-hook. Works best on strappy or sleeveless items. If you want to watch a grown man have a temper tantrum than try watching him try and get his golf shirt off of one of these suckers. It’s not user friendly.
  • Price – Affordable (I saw packs of 50 for as low as $22) But make sure to compare prices as there is a huge rage. Remember you pay for what you get so buy the best quality you can afford.
  • Where to Buy – QVC, Costco, HSN, Homegoods, etc. They are starting to be everywhere.

Padded Hanger

  •  Pros – You don’t need to have a lot of these but they are great for hanging lightweight sweaters that would otherwise get wrinkled when folded. SEE CHART BELOW
  • Cons – Not many except that they cost more and take up twice the room as a slim hanger. Stay away from the silky ones because they are slippery.
  • Price – Roughly $2 a hanger.
  • Where to Buy – Amazon, Bed, Bath and Beyond.

Plastic/Tube Hangers

 Pros – They will do the job just fine, look for the notched version. Available in pretty much every color. Perfect for a college dorm or the kids room where you know they will not be a permanent fixture in your wardrobe.

Cons – I know it is horrible but they are ugly. Obviously no swivel S-hook action. They can sometimes leave those wretched bumps in the shoulders of some of your shirts. And it can drive you crazy when something keeps slipping off or pants slide over.

Price – At an average of about .30 a hanger you this is an easy switch. I use these in the small size for our kids.  I hang their clothes right out of the dryer and the kids can put them away themselves.

Where to Buy – The Dollar Store, Big Lots, mass discounters.

Wire Hangers

My consulting style is very laid back in the sense that I am not there as a dictator but more of a guide to help you find your own style. But when it comes to wire hangers I am ruthless, so I am not going into cost or where to buy because just don’t.

They ruin your clothes by putting protruding dents in the fabric of the your shirts in the shoulders which can quickly give you the Lady GaGa look.

 They are cheap. They are weak. They tangle together like a cruel game of barrel of monkeys that you just can’t win.  The drycleaners use them as a means for us to take our clothes home, not to store them on. Leave some empty nice hangers right in your coat closet so that you can take off the crappy wire ones as soon as you get home from the drycleaners.  Don’t forget it is especially important to take your clothes out of the chemical filled drycleaner bags and let them breathe.  Put a bin at the bottom of your coat closet for the discarded wire hangers so you can take  them back to the drycleaners for recycling.

THERE ARE 2 EXCEPTIONS:

1. When I pick up sweaters that have been drycleaned and folded over the rounded bar style. Then I leave them like that until I am ready to wear them or store them away folded.

2. Men’s dress shirts, provided they are in constant rotation. So if the tux shirt comes home after a party and is only worn about once a year then I transfer it to a wood hanger. But if we are talking about dress shirts that are in constant rotation between the drycleaner and being worn than I leave them there knowing they are only on those for a short amount of time. Same thing for dress pants that are in constant use.

So are you ready to get started??

Make the best of it by pouring a very large cup of coffee (or wine!), put on your favorite movie or music, and set forth in transforming your space, which can be completed in about 1 hour. Chances are after you start you will be motivated to clean out anyway.

  • Buy the best quality you can can afford, even if it means not being able to do the whole closet right away.   Buying from a bulk distributor or online wholesaler will help to keep the cost down.  
  • Start small. Rome wasn’t built in a day. Take things out in small groups, not the whole shebang or you will be faced with an overwhelming tsunami of clothes. If needed you can even break it into a section each night.
  • This makes a fabulous gift. Even more so if you share the closet and you get to reap the benefits.

You know that person that you never know what to buy for them? Buy them hangers. Such a nice splurge and they will think of you every day.  I know it sounds silly but wouldn’t you love it? This is an especially good guy gift. You would be surprised how many men really appreciate it when their closet feels put together. I eventually did my husbands closet in all wood hangers and they are perfect for his hang-to-dry golf shirts. Want to go an extra step further? Hire me and I will get you the hangers and have the items transferred to their new matching homes in about an hour.

My picks for the best hangers…

I’ve put together an online catalogue you can shop from. You’ll also see some other of my favorite storage solutions and my go-to chrome hangers for pants.

BONUS!

Looking to put some new items into your closet?

Here is the link to my picks for fall essentials (all under $100!!) from the Nordstrom Sale.

Thanks for reading!

Suzie

Shopping 911 Call

Have you ever had an occasion sort of sneak up on you? It’s in the back of your mind and then suddenly you realize what Month it is and then your event is this weekend…and you have nothing to wear? Maybe your are busy or maybe, you are like Erin, who would rather go the dentist than go shopping, so you keep putting it off and putting off and next thing you know your event is the next day!

Erin is one of my very best friends, but for as much as we have in common we couldn’t be more different when it comes to shopping. She likes to go shopping about as much as I like to go to the gym, which is not at all. So it was of no surprise to me when Erin called me this past Friday from the fitting room, needing my help. The only issue is that she lives in Atlanta and I was working from home in snowy Pennsylvania. But here’s the thing…that’s really not at issue at all. Thanks to technology we got her entire outfit ready to go, head to toe, in about 35 minutes. So how exactly does virtual styling work?

Tell Me Your Style

Luckily with Erin I already know that she is not super girly Sleek, chic and nothing fussy always suits her best. She has no trouble getting dressed every day but it’s occasions like this (school fundraiser with the word “Gala” in the title) that throw her a little off. She’s most comfortable in solid colors and nothing too bright or with too much pattern.

Tell Me Your Budget

Erin is a very practical person by nature and therefore also in her purchases, meaning if she has to go out and buy something she is hoping to get more than one use out of it. She doesn’t impulse buy and she doesn’t go out just browsing shops. That being said convenience is key so if the price is reasonable she is not going to keep looking for a cheaper alternative.

Tell Me Your Location

She usually has a purpose in mind and wants to get it done quickly. Because of this she does better in stores that are not too overwhelming (so no TJ Maxx types where she has too many choices). Chain stores, department stores, and places with helpful staff are the ideal places for her to shop.

Give Me About An Hour

With face-time and a computer I can quickly locate what you need and where to get it. We started with Erin calling me from the fitting room in the Banana Republic that is located in a shopping center with lots of other stores. She had picked out this jumpsuit and liked it because it was comfortable and definitely something she could wear again.

While the jumpsuit looked great as is, I knew we had to dial it up a notch to get it gala ready. She also needed a shoe with a substantial heel to balance the wide leg crop style of the jumpsuit. Looking online we found these block heel silver metallic sandals that were perfect.

http://bit.ly/2GYR9ww

The jumpsuit came with a belt in the same fabric that could be tied into a bow and hang at the waist, but the casual drape of the belt wasn’t going to cut it. Erin has a tiny waist (even though I know she will say no she doesn’t as she is reading this) so defining it with a sleek belt would make the jumpsuit feel more custom. I was looking for a belt that would have some sort of stretch to it as those are the kind that typically fit the best over a thin fabric and won’t shift around. I didn’t see anything online on Banana but I knew there was a White House Black Market store next door to her. We scored right away with this perfect piece, especially with the silver trim to tie into the shoes.

http://bit.ly/2H0QMBH

Now we have a sleek look of the black jumpsuit, silver block sandals, and the belt. All that was left was to find some simple but bold jewelry that would compliment the feel of the rest of the outfit, and a great clutch.

http://bit.ly/2GYlD1x

While I was looking online and Erin used her phone to have me virtually look through the jewelry I spotted these lucite oversize drop earrings. I loved them for her because I know she can wear them again and the curved shape softens some of the other more linear looks on the belt and the shoes. She absolutely could have added a small necklace or even a larger more bold silver necklace but this is where I believe the jewelry has to fit the personality. She is more minimal in her style and adding a necklace would have felt too much on her, so we decided to skip it and add a bracelet instead.

http://bit.ly/2ISdSMF

They don’t have a picture online of the exact bracelet we spotted for Erin but this bracelet works just as well. It’s perfect because again it will work for everyday but yet add just a touch of interest to the outfit for the party. The clean and sleek nature of it blends well with the belt and earrings. Next it was on to a clutch. While Erin did have a black clutch at home I spotted this clutch as she was walking around. Even better the already reasonably priced jewelry was buy one get one 1/2 off.

http://bit.ly/2J5DiGL

Yes, I know it is blue and the rest of the outfit was black, but the deep blue actually felt like the perfect unexpected compliment to the otherwise all black ensemble. Sometimes it’s that feel of something being a little off, or not so matchy-matchy that take the style of an outfit to a more personalized and unique level. Plus this is the type of clutch that she can throw into her work tote and pull out later for drinks with friends.

The Result…

She looks amazing!!!

I’m not just saying this because I helped her or because she is one of my best friends and is gorgeous, but she looks amazing because she was comfortable. She looks like herself, just kicked up a notch, and the overall effect is an effortless chic. All of the items can easily be incorporated back into her wardrobe for maximum versatility. It was a total success and I got her out of the stores in under an hour!

*Insider Tip – Think Outside The Box

Although the invitation said Gala most of the men were wearing suits. The go-to would have been a cocktail dress of some kind but a jumpsuit works much better for Erin and she was still completely in line with the rest of the looks for the evening. The best part is how many opportunities she will have to wear these pieces again.

Pair with a denim jacket and slides for a great travel look or for the weekend.

Or put the clutch and silver heels back to any white top and jeans and you have a girls night out or date night look.

Ready To Shop?

Give me a call and I can email you a personalized shopping list for a specific outfit or occasion, or we can make a date to shop together virtually! Send me an email when you are ready…suzie@suziegaffney.com

Thanks for reading!

Suzie

Red Carpet Rundown for the Oscars 2019

The power of pink…

From blush to berry and all kinds of shades in between, this was the color that dominated on the red carpet last night, worn by a range of ages and even including one very manly man.  Another huge trend was volume…at the hips, at the shoulders at the back, dresses were big and bold and had me wondering how in the world any of these women used the ladies room. The use of tulle was extensive and had some dresses looking like they were decorations at a wedding and not the red carpet. Capes and suits popped up on quite a few celebrities and J.Lo made herself into a stunningly gorgeous real life disco ball. Overall I loved the color but I wasn’t freaking out about that many of the dresses, although some had me freaking out wondering why some stars were allowed to leave their homes in their dresses. Read on below for a visual recap of the highs and lows and the narrow and wide and everything in between.

Similar to the Oscars I am going to save the best for last and start off with the WTFs of the night.

Oh E! Channel, Why Oh Why?

Although they weren’t on the red carpet they were covering it, and they knew they would be covering it seated together. I’m not saying they had to be wedding party style coordinated but Good Lord was this a mess. Neon, polka dot prairie look, and nude tulle. I barely heard what they were saying because I was so disturbed by this visual hot mess. I’m not even sure I even liked any of these looks on their own let along thrown side by side.

Pink Mistake

 

Kacey Musgraves, Maya Rudolph and Linda Cardellini clearly got together and robbed a Jo-Annes craft store to create these dresses. One stole all the dark pink tulle and the other went with light pink tulle. Maya went for the this floral tragedy included a matching and equally as tragic cape. Nobody wins in this category.

Ummmmm…

This was designed by Christian Siriano and there were a lot of people who loved it. I am all for people expressing themselves, so it’s not the fact that this is a man wearing this Tuxess (tux + dress) but rather the fact that the whole silhouette bore a striking resemblance to Ursula. Ursula was a scary villain in The Little Mermaid, even giving adults the creeps.

They Get a C for Effort…

Tina Fey and Laura Dern. These dresses aren’t awful but it’s like they chose not to try. I feel like they went in their closets and decided to reuse bridesmaids dresses that somebody once forced them to wear for a wedding.

They Wear The Pants…

So suits were a thing…I think in this category I’m going to pick Amy Poehler. She was a presenter and wearing the big traditional gowns has never really worked well for her because she never really looked that comfortable wearing them. She can pull this off because she looks like she is happy in it. I love the sideswept hair to soften the whole look. Oh and she can store snacks in her pockets! I know I would…

So Close, Yet So Faraway…

Amy Adams looks better in color, she just does. And even black. Imagine this dress on her in black and it is so much more striking (at least in my mind it is). But this pale shade makes her disappear and I don’t like that because I like her. And the texture feels a bit like scales. Kind of reminiscent of that creepy blue thing Rebecca Romijn did for a movie.

Speaking of scales I wanted to like this because I love her but I just didn’t love it. I didn’t like the texture, the Star-Trek like shape or the color. But I do like her shoes!

I’d prefer to have both of these beautiful ladies fight over something more simple and sleek like this white gown.

I wanted to love Charlize because she rarely disappoints. I don’t know…maybe it’s the hair? She is so very good as a blonde that this look feels very snow white and harsh. And the seems darting at the boobs are unflattering to her amazing figure. This one bummed me out.

Failed It & Nailed It.

There’s almost always some red on the red carpet but in this case one nailed it and one failed it. The creepy latex crop top on Rachel Weisz felt so very wrong. I just kept imagining it to be super sweaty. On the other hand Jennifer Hudson has a diva voice (in a good way) and this gown complimented her in every way. Flattering and fun with the asymmetrical ruffle I really loved it on her.

A Pair of Hips are Born…

Lady Gaga why the hip thing? Do you think she thought she would get tired out there wand wanted somewhere to rest her hands? Is this what tiny people do, ask the designer to create hips for her hands? She changed into something a little better but after her previous choices this awards season this one felt like a bit of goth Disney Princess. I keep imagining how much prettier this look would have been in a soft pink or white (see my rudimental mock-up). But I’m going to give her a pass because her powerhouse voice gave me chills while the chemistry between her and the beautiful Bradly Cooper had me feeling their high temperature chemistry. Truly an amazing duet that continues to give me chills each time I watch it.

Eye Candy For Every Age…

Speaking of the boys…Sam Elliot, Bradley Cooper and Trevor Noah were my favorites. Classic and tailored tuxes worked perfectly on them. I love that Trevor went for the double breasted tux and it fits him perfectly. These are men that know that they are really, really, really attractive, so they don’t have to wear some kind of funky tuxedo that is screaming at the camera.

But sometimes, when you are such a presence like Jason Moama, you can take a risk and it works. This is a man that is going to stand out no matter what so he decides to completely go for it. His pale pink velvet blush suit was designed by the late Karl Lagerfeld and if any man can rock the pink without anyone giving him a hard time I’d say it’s Jason. He always comes across like a big happy handsome teddy bear so his great smile was the perfect accessory to tie together this look. Oh and take note of the matching custom made scrunchie. In my mind these two live in a cool bungalow on a beach or on a mountain and they make homemade granola and sleep in a bed covered with fur…okay maybe I am thinking a little too much about these two but clearly they are much cooler than most of us.

The Style Statements of The Night…

US actress Allison Janney arrives for the 91st Annual Academy Awards at the Dolby Theatre in Hollywood, California on February 24, 2019. (Photo by Mark RALSTON / AFP) (Photo credit should read MARK RALSTON/AFP/Getty Images)

Before I mention the ladies who were pretty in pink there was one in black velvet and satin that slayed it. In fact, more and more she is becoming a personal favorite for her stylish red carpet spot on looks. Alison Janey was my second favorite look of the night. She knows what works on her body but it never feels boring. Simply gorgeous. This tied with another dress for my 2nd fav.

Light pleated layers were another trend on the carpet. While they both look great I have to pick Helen Mirren in this category.This is an actress who knows who she is and how to carry herself with confidence. She twisted and twirled in this pleated confection and the best part is you can tell she is having fun, which makes anything she wears that much better.

This is a toss up for me. Gemma Chan in this tiered pink frock took a risk by going with this light and airy look instead of the usually evening gown style. Her hair and her makeup perfectly compliment the shape of this dress and she looks like a breath of fresh spring air, but I get that it reminds a lot of people of a dust ruffle. Angela Basset does not age. This color is stunning and I love her long tumbled ponytail. My only complaint is the nature of this fabric that must have gotten creased on the car ride over. I wish her stylist would have transported her over on a bus where she could stand up the whole time!



I mean JLo…and that body in that dress and that look. She knows how fierce this whole look is. Love the prism geometric styled clutch and the to the floor length. A disco ball column dress? On on Jenny and it’s tied for number 2 for top 3 favorite looks.

And then I saw this dress. And I gasped. That color, that cut, her makeup, her hair, the earrings, the silver shoes. This is a dress I have never seen before and it is not a shade of pink we often see on the red carpet. She looked regal and chic, it is drop dead mic drop gorgeous dress. I love it from every angle.

And finally…does this dress bring you Joy?

Do you think she held it and asked herself this very question? And not be mean but didn’t anyone else ask why she was there? Do you think she was tempted to tidy up the bathroom when she used it? So many questions…

 

Thank you so much for reading! Remember that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and that fashion is art in clothing form. All of these designs come from someone’s heart, soul and tremendous hard work so by no means to I mean to put anyone down, (okay maybe just the person who made Linda Cardellini look like a human loofah), so please know that this post is mean to be funny. Fashion, art and beauty are all subjective and there truly is no right or wrong (except men in denim shorts). Thanks again!

Suzie

Golden Globes 2019 Red Carpet Review

While it was quite different from last year’s Blackout On The Red Carpet , I can’t exactly say I was blown away by what is usually one of the most fun nights for fashion on the red carpet during awards season. Maybe my expectations were too high or maybe I’m just getting old and grumpy, but my overall feeling was very “mehh.” But none the less the show (aka annual blog post review) must go on so read on below to get a recap of what made it’s way down the red carpet runway last night. Want to know my overall favorite look? It’s at the very bottom as I saved the best for last.

Seeing Red

No surprise as red is usually a “look at me I want attention” kind of color, so there are usually quite a few women who aren’t afraid to compete with the carpet color.

Who Wore It Best?

My pick is for Chrissy Metz on the left. Her hair and makeup looked elegant and flawless, and I loved the way the cut of the dress opened up her neckline. Also loved the detail on the sleeve. I can’t look at Laura Dern’s dress and not think of those paper decorations that you unfold into a shape and hang from a ceiling for a school Valentine’s Day party .

White Out

White is a classic choice and I give anyone credit who wears it without getting makeup, food, wine or just random dirt on the dress. I’ve only worn a formal white dress once and that was too my wedding and it looked like I went through war by the end of the night.

Who Wore It Best?

I’m going with co-host Sandra Oh because it fit her beautifully and love the way she did her hair to sort of balance out the shoulder detail. I thought I loved Julia Moore’s dress when they were interviewing her from the waist up and then they panned down and I wanted to cry. What happened there? Swap out that weird textured skirt that meets the top at a totally unflattering angle for a skinny pair of black ankle tuxedo pants and this could have been a contender.

Black and White

Another classic combo, usually you can’t go wrong but yet somehow people do. I’m looking at you Amber Heard.

Who Wore It Best?

I wanted to like Rachel’s dress on the left but the top was too close to what the dryer things look like at our local drive through car wash. And Amber, wtf? We will get to you later. Really no one stood a chance at the perfection that was Charlize. Absolutely stunning.

Neutral Territory

I love shimmer and glitter and shine, but this neutral shade can be super tricky to wear because it can draw attention and drown you out all at the same time.

Who Wore It Best?

Emily Blunt’s started out okay at the top but the bottom looked like a doily that would be on grandma’s chair. I love Keri’s dress but I’m not into the 12 year old boy breastplate look. If that came together as a halter neck it would have been perfect. Saoirse’s delicate waves of beads made me wonder how she was able to sit. I got it give it to Felicity for a well cut dress that shimmered in all the right spots.

The Bold and The Beautiful

Go big or go home was the motto for these actresses so they made sure their dresses made a statement with a ton of fabric and color.



Who Wore It Best?

I know there were a lot of fans of Gaga’s gown but I just felt like it was like a Disney Princess dress gone wrong. Just too much and I those sleeves were really, really too much. Catherine’s green was pretty but Gemma’s blue was badass chic. It had a lovely back with a bow detail and her hair and makeup were all on point with the whole look.

Best Hair

I loved all of these loose waves but Emma Stone’s color, cut and subtle wave was stunning.

Worst Hair

This slicked back updo look seemed to be a thing last night and I don’t think it should have. Maybe this was a way to get their faces to look tighter but pulling it back with such severity was not the answer. But Kate Mara’s oddly pulled and cinched pony was just not right.

Tulle Time

You have to wonder if there was a clearance sale at Michael’s Craft Store and they discounted all of the tulle ribbon. Or maybe it was like Project Runway where the challenge was to use as much of it as possible.

Who Wore It Worse?

I can’t. I just don’t like it all. Any of them. But in this case I’m going to go with who wore it worse and Lucy Liu added those hideous gel window clings to hers to seal her fate.

Bone-In Bras

This was a common theme yesterday where we got to see the boning of the corset of the dress. I’m not sure why.

Who Wore It Worse?

The two nude (and tulle) offenders added in odd chokers. But Heidi Klum has been doing this a long, long time and she should know better then to try and put her two golden globes into this awkward mesh drooping casing. I won’t even talk about the flowers because I just can’t.

Also Trending…

Matching your hair color to your dress or your makeup to your dress. Not sure I can agree with either of these….

My Least Favs

I love green, it’s my favorite color. But the green leather? It’s not working. Back to whatever is happening with the Kate Mara alien look. She is beautiful, this look is not. The pushed together boobies with gemstones atop a peach nightie is what I imagine an alien from the 1960s to wear to sleep in. And Amber, what is happening? She is one of the most beautiful women on the planet and yet she decided to resurrect the Jessica McClintock Gunne Sax late 80s prom look, complete with harsh makeup and ringlet hair. Why?

What I’d Change…

So Anne Hathaway went with this sexy leopard look and I just couldn’t buy it on her. It wasn’t a terrible dress but I would have loved to see it on Catherine Zeta Jones who can carry off this kind of sex-appeal. And that gorgeous shade of green that Catherine wore would have looked even better on Anne, especially with her sleek and straight hair.

The bold floral look is tricky and while I didn’t hate it on Molly Simms I think I like her in something a bit more modern and sleek. I also think her skin tone would have carried it off a bit better and her soft curls added a softer touch to the overall look of the silver dress. In contrast I think the bold floral pattern and jewel tone colors would have warmed up Saoirse skin tone a bit and been a nice contrast to her straight bob hair style.

My Favorite Looks

Loved this look as something different for Julia I just would have liked to see a red lip for a slight pop of color to offset the pale nude shade of the top. Gemma’s bold, blue and bow in the back look was so pretty. The matching closed toe shoes were the perfect choice to the unexpected hemline. Allison Janney has consistently nailed her red carpet looks for the past few years now, and this was no exception. The chunky jewels were a welcome change from the usual delicate diamonds. It was hard to pick an overall favorite but it I am going head to toe than it is Charlize. Her skin was glowing. The hair was sleek and chic and she looked sexy and sophisticated. When you are as gorgeous as she is it just goes to show that keeping it simple and classic works every time, ditto for her hair and makeup.

So who were your favorites? Hits? Misses? Remember, the very best part about fashion is that it is subjective. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder so there are no rules, only your opinion. And while I love fashion and style the goal is never to take it, or ourselves, too seriously.

Thanks for reading!

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