I come at this Red Carpet Review with an eyes half shut view. The Hollywood Foreign Press took an unprecedented year off of anointing awards not just because of Covid but because of a much bigger issuer of diversity and inclusion. So this year was to be an open reception of race, gender, and identity inclusion. I expected the red carpet to explode with expression and color and instead, in my opinion, it imploded with darkness and boredom.

Maybe everyone was being cautious and afraid to go over the top and celebrate. But personally I was bored and found most of it dark and depressing. Here is my breakdown and what I would change up if I could.

My favorite looks.

There is color, there is style, there is fit. There is a cohesive thought between the hair and the makeup. The accessories perfectly compliment the whole look. Note the stunning green clutch and the subtle jewelry. These looks made me look twice and I love that no one looks overwhelmed or uncomfortable.

For me, it’s not a true red carpet if we don’t see some shine. Thankfully some of these OG women understood the assignment and they brought out the sparkle and sequins and stepped up the attitude. These women are veterans and they played it classic and chic. Oh and Hi Angela Bassett, can I have your arms??

Best Dressed Couple

Eddie Murphy is not aging. I don’t know what he is doing but he does not look 61. These two are a red carpet home run. They look great together and it’s very classic Hollywood. Love it.

Not A Fan

Usually you can’t go wrong with a black dress but these looks all felt very heavy and very somber. Maybe because it’s the middle of winter and everyone looks like they have been hiding indoors.

I like both of these women so much but I don’t love the extra fabric that they are dragging around like Linus and his blankie. I would be so worried about someone tripping over it, and I would hate to drag all of that into the ladies room and then wonder what else I drug out with me. I think both of these dresses would be perfect on their own and without the added poofy trains.

Early 90s prom dresses were as big as we tried to get our hair. I was there and I remember the end of the 80s spilling over to big dresses with awkward proportions. These both flashed me back there and not in a good way. Even the color way felt very late 80s. It gave me Adam Sandler’s The Wedding Singer feels.

I know showing off midriff is a thing but these dresses just feel like they were on Project Runway and Tim Gunn yelled “Times Up” and they couldn’t finish the fabric. Although there was plenty of extra fabric at the bottom. I’m super confused by the color choice on the left and the whole thing feels like it was inspired by The Grim Reaper.

Let’s Switch It Up

Now time for my favorite game where I like to play stylist and switch up these looks. Some of these aren’t terrible to start but I think they could be benefit from a change up.

I almost feel bad switching it up because the actress on the left looks pretty much perfect. But I need to steal her dress to put it on Julia so I will have to put her into this pink frothy Chanel creation which I think she can carry off. Please excuse the bobble head images and my poor editing skills. I just think a more streamlined silhouette is more flattering on Julia. Or maybe I just can’t stop seeing her as Ruth from Ozark and Ruth would never wear pink ruffles.

Switch Number Two

Both of these dresses are really beautiful. There is exquisite detail and design but I just think if we did a swap the subtle difference in shades would pop more.

I also love the way the longer hair with the soft ways softens up the grid pattern of the dress, while Jessica’s pulled back style feels less severe when it is paired with a gentle cascade of ruffles.

For me, hair color and style is just as much as part of the outfit as the dress itself. The red dress is stunning on the actress on the left, but once again I’d like to steal it for Ana. And I think Ana’s dress would look great with darker hair and a red lip.

There’s No Real Fix Here.

I honestly don’t like either of the dresses below. I feel like they remind me of wedding cakes. But, I still think they can benefit from a switch, and again it comes down to coloring, or frosting flavors. One is buttercream and the other is classic vanilla.

It’s A Nice Day For A Goth Wedding

I feel like Marilyn Manson would want his bride to wear one of these dresses. And why oh why did they add plastic black chokers to this look? The whole thing looks itchy. And the dress on the right reminds of that episode of Friends where Rachel attempt to make the English Trifle but ends up blending two recipes when the pages of the cookbook get stuck together. Here English Trifle and Shepherd’s pie creation is a disaster. I Theis dress on the right started out with one look and then merged into a heavy black tulle abyss. I don’t want these two to switch dresses. I just want them to throw them away.

Oh, and Ana Taylor-Joy? Blink twice if you need help. I just watched The Menu and maybe you are trying to tell us that your stylist is holding you captive. The hair is severe and the so is the dress, she looks like she is stuck and cold. I just want to give her a blanket. Maybe she can borrow Niecy Nash’s cape thing?

Disclaimer.

If you have ever read any of my red carpet reviews before than you already know this disclaimer… I do not judge any of these women on their craft of acting and I think it’s completely unfair that they contractually have to walk these red carpets as part of their press junkets to promote their movie, tv show, or any other artistic endeavor. An actor’s ability to portray a role with passion and authenticity should in no way be tied to any sort of a fashionista status. Hiring a personal stylist can make this process much easier. An experienced stylist isn’t supposed to just throw a designer outfit onto their clients’ bodies, it is to be an interpreter of sorts who will translate high fashion into a wearable art/language for their client. These are not and should not be makeover events. This is a highly sensitive position of understanding their client, their client’s position, and their intended message in the media in terms of their current project that they are responsible for representing. I’m not talking about what a lead actress wears outside to get her trash cans, or walk her dogs, I’m talking about when an actress has to ride a fine line between acting their part of a character they are being paid to portray and matching it to public perception of how the general population prefers to “see” this actress/character versus the living, breathing, human being who is wearing a costume/uniform as part of their job. I would likely bet that half of these women don’t even like to shop and dread having to walk the red carpet. A huge majority of my clients hire me because shopping is not something they enjoy and they don’t want to spend time on doing something they don’t like. I am very lucky that I get to have a job where I encourage women to wear what they want wherever they want. There will always be opinions of style and fashion but truly the only one that matters is your own.

Thanks for reading!

Suzie